critical thinkers, not critical people

I have learned a lot about leadership from TK. TK has been a leader in my life, in some capacity or another, since I was 16 (that’s 12 years if you are mathematically challenged). One thing I have learned from him is that leaders must be critical thinkers, but not critical people. As I work with students (and let’s be honest, with people in general), I find that most people don’t really know the difference. 

A critical thinker

• Recognizes that things are never perfect
• Identifies the areas that can improve
• Builds plans and strategies to accomplish that improvement
• Is willing to think outside of cultural or organizational norms
• Isn’t afraid to try new things 
• Isn’t afraid to kill traditions that aren’t working
• Offers and accepts criticism

Leaders must be critical thinkers, or they aren’t leading. They are merely managing. However, it can be much easier to slip into being a critical person. 

A critical person

• Recognizes things aren’t perfect
• Points out the things that aren’t working
• Doesn’t have plan for improvement
• May have a plan for improvement, but never follows through
• Loves to complain
• Loves to blame-shift
• Points out how much greener the grass is everywhere else
• Points out how terrible everyone else is at their job
• Is perpetually infected with the ‘woe-is-me’ syndrome, because nothing can ever get better

Critical people are debbie downers. They may be seeing the same things critical people are seeing, but they aren’t doing anything about it. These people aren’t leaders. They are poison.

Nelson Mandela summed this idea up really well:

You see, criticism must be dignifed. We must be factual, we must be realistic, we must be honest, but at the same time… we are builders.

If your criticism doesn’t build or change anything, it’s time for some self-evaluation.
Are you a critical person? Or a critical thinker?
… Leader or poison?

they say i’m a dreamer…

Recently I read a book that challenged me in lots of ways. (I’ve been doing a lot of reading lately… I’ll have to post about my job later so you understand why…)
Anyway. I anticipate at least a few posts are going to come from the things my reading is causing me to think through. This excerpt is where I’m at today:

Whether we ever see our dream fulfilled in our lifetime isn’t really my point. The very act of dreaming big – allowing your heart and mind to pursue a vision that is bigger than you can handle – will change you in some very significant ways…

1. Big dreams change your questions.
2. Big dreams change your prayers.
   If you don’t have a dream that leads you to greater dependence on God, then you need to get a bigger dream!
3. Big dreams change others.
4. Big dreams change you.
   Your dream will definite your identity, your relationship with God, and your closest relationships in ministry.

I honestly am really convicted by the thought that I don’t often dream big enough. Do I have a dream that leads me to depend even more deeply on the Lord? And am I willing to pursue that dream? Or to I only pursue things that are ‘practical’ … I think we use that word when we actually mean we pursue things that are attainable on our own, things that aren’t really too scary or uncertain, or things that most people around us approve of.

Every part of me believes that the Lord lays dreams on each of our hearts. The thing that deep down you would love to do. The thing that, if you could be guaranteed you wouldn’t fail at, you would go after immediately. The thing that you instantly get passionate about when it comes up in conversation, and you can tell people around you are wondering why you’re getting all worked up.

Unfortunately, due to the culture we live in, many of us never slow down and quiet down long enough to let the Spirit open our eyes, our minds, our hearts, to what that God given dream is.

And if we do, we are so afraid to fail, and so desperate to please people, that we convince ourselves that our dreams are childish, that we are grownups now and need to be practical, that dreams don’t put food on the table.

I’m not saying we should be foolish. But I am saying we should have faith.

What would you do knew you wouldn’t fail?
What does your mind wander most often to?
What gets you worked up?
… What’s your dream?

And what’s stopping you from pursuing it?

‘If you don’t have a dream that leads you to greater dependence on God, then you need to get a bigger dream.’

jersey

it is very tricky for me to update both this blog and my work blog. i’m sure i’ve whined about this before. just reiterating.

so. the rescue was un.be.lieve.able. holy smokes. i attended the rescue in cincinnati, and we were rescued by bengals player, chinedum ndukwe. pretty sweet. then i stayed connected by following the live feed from the invisible children offices in san diego (and made some new friends — cameron and marcus) and got so excited, i decided to drive out to chicago, the last city standing. hundreds of people were there, i got to meet bobby bailey, one of the founders (!! i thought i was going to wet my pants!), and then sadly had to return to winona because of work. chicago was finally rescued, one week after camping out, by none other than oprah. they sang and danced to get her attention (who doesn’t love a musical?? watch the video here) and she brought them on her show LIVE!

incredible. we were making history. i love that i got to be a part of it. mmm.

in other news, since that time i’ve been in philadelphia, massachusetts, connecticut, and now new jersey. tomorrow i go home to start vacay before another glorious summer of operation barnabas starts.

i’ve been thinking a lot about mary  (the mother of Jesus)… i’m reading luke now, and i wonder how much she really understood when she was pregnant and as Jesus was growing up. i’m thinking and praying through these stories i’ve known since i was a little girl in a whole new way — i want them to be more than stories. i want the people to come alive, to be real people, to try to understand more of their thoughts and emotions… it’s very interesting. i don’t really have any insights into how she felt. just thinking.

it’s not good to be alone…

This morning as I was praying, I thanked God for friends who are in ministry…

 I had been reflecting on the last couple days of the CE Leadership Summit, and the people we were surrounded by: youth pastors and volunteer workers from youth groups all across the country. And so many of these people are our friends. And I realized, it’s no small thing to have friends who understand your passions and your heart.

For us, they are people who…

 – know that ministry is way more than 40 hours a week

 – get excited about new ways to connect with a bunch of teenagers

 – love to learn

 – are critical, not just to be critical, but because they want to see things constantly getting better

 – are able to listen to a presentation and be facebooking at the same time

 – love free resources, no matter how old they are

 – know that it’s not about US. it’s about training up YOUTH to LEAD. NOW.

Seriously, what a privilege to know these people. Thanks for being a part of our lives.

content.

Today I was walking home for lunch (it’s roughly 182 steps. Don’t be too impressed.), and I was overwhelmed by how much I love what is happening right now. My ‘job’ doesn’t even feel like a job. Well, sometimes it does — like this morning when I was wrestling with the paper-cutter, or trying to figure out how to share my printer on the network, or come up with more names to send support letters to.  

But seriously. I’m not trying to throw it up in your face … but I have never been more excited about a job than I am about this one. I get to meet youth and their pastors, have a lot of conversations about discipleship, walk with students in finding disciplers & sort out what the discipleship process looks like, encourage youth pastors with resources, redefine what our ‘follow-up’ looks like after our summer ministries… Man. I love it.

On top of that, I get to work with one of my best friends in the world, who encourages and sharpens me all the time. We get to read sweet books, create new materials, and be hilarious. (Well I suppose that goes without saying).

I’m being discipled by a woman that I respect and would love to be like. I can’t wait to see how the Lord continues to use her to refine me over the next 2 years.

CE is an organization that the Lord has used to impact my life beyond explanation, and I cannot believe I have the chance to work with and for them.

More than any of that, I was totally overwhelmed, as I was making my short walk home, how much I love Jesus. And how he first loved me and saved me and gave me a hunger and desire for him. And what an outrageous privilege it is to serve him and learn more about him.

Sheesh. All that during my 182 steps home.

relevant reading…

Thom Yorke is on the cover of the Nov/Dec issue of Relevant … covered in chocolate … was reading through it today and noted a few things::

‘According to CareerBuilder.com, 21% of people making more than $100,000 a year say they’re living paycheck to paycheck …’

Random quote (p.18). Serious. What is happening… 

‘Never taught the importance of encountering God daily through the Bible and prayer, many people who have had a genuine, heartfelt encounter with God have allowed the experience to grow stale. Living meeting to meeting is not just hard-it’s counter to a vibrant Christian life…
That’s not to criticize the meetings-they often stoke the embers in those individuals’ hearts. It’s only to point out that it’s individuals, seeking God and reflecting His glory, who move the hearts of most individuals. God is actively placing individuals stoked with the fires of personal revival into the woodpile in the places where a fire has a far better chance of breaking out.’  –randy bohlender, ‘pursuing personal revival’ (p.24)

This idea of ‘living on yesterday’s manna’ seems to be the theme of the month for me. I love the affirmation that the ‘mountain-top experience’ is real, but the issue is teaching people how to carry on once they are home again. Hello, sound like a job description to anyone? Hmmm… 

 

‘It’s amazing how easy empathy is from a distance. Kids far too young for the dirty reality of surprise pregnancies and painful miscarriages experience these things all the time, and my heart breaks for them when they’re not sitting next to me on the bus.’ –adam smith, ‘bus stops & missed opportunities’ (p26)

I read about this story first on a friend’s blog. This man, Adam, was waiting for a bus, and this teenage couple waiting there near him is distraught over having their second miscarriage. They asked him to sit by them, just to talk with them, to be a friend to them … and he is annoyed. Tired. Ready to get out of there. And far too often that statement is true… I’m all about being the listening ear and helping the hurting and the oppressed — until it is an inconvenience to me.

that’s what he said …

Just a few things I’ve heard//read in seminars//blogs lately…

 

The desire to develop people must color every conversation and factor into every encounter.

::Steven Furtick::

 

Symbolic leadership: to do for one what I wish I could do for all.

Don’t try to be fair–fairness is the enemy of rightness.

::Andy Stanley::

 

Trustworthiness is not flawlessness.

::Andy Stanley::

 

In correcting the mistakes of those we lead, it’s not enough to identify the issue. It’s also inadequate to simply drive toward a solution. We’ve got over communicate the reason behind the decision making. Otherwise we will never enable those we lead to make the decision better the next time, resulting in an ongoing culture of decision dependancy. 

::Steven Furtick::

reunion :: update

I’ll go Mark Artrip fashion and throw it all out there from the weekend, ‘mind dump’ style:

1. Roughly 14 hrs to drive there and 14 hrs to drive home – with 38 hours actually in Philadelphia. Ugh.
2. So amazingly good to see Chris again — he is a friend like none other. I know the Lord has called him to Sebring and he is using him there … but I do wish he was a little closer.
3. Jade Palace sweet tea = delish.
4. Stacie hit the brakes on the bus and I was standing on the steps navigating … I hit the windshield hard. Somehow that hurt my arm…
5. I  l o v e  these Barnabas students. I had conversations with at least a dozen of them that made my heart feel like it would explode because they are letting the Lord lead and use them so powerfully.

NOTE: Let me say something about those students. The overwhelming majority of students who are doing exceedingly well have a couple things in common: first, they are being discipled. HUGE. Second, they are intentional about consistent time in the Word. I’m not trying to oversimplify, but it’s just the truth.

6. Matt & I each had a part in breaking Eric’s car door key off in his door. At 1.30am. Whoops. They and a few boys then stayed up til 4 am waiting for a locksmith. (Not me, I went to bed).
7. Urban Hope has been running for 10 years. Hearing testimonies of what God has done in lives in that neighborhood through that ministry was humbling and exciting.
8. We got home at 1am last night. I am sick. (thanks Eric) And exhausted.

I’ll be honest. I was not excited about the driving. About the chaotic schedule.
This the best weekend I’ve had in a long time. Because I connected with students who are hungry for the Lord, hungry for wisdom, needing prayer, needing reminders of who they are in Jesus, needing someone to cry to, someone to get excited for them, someone to love them … students who my heart is so full for. That sounds cheesy. I don’t care. It’s true. My heart feels like it’s going to burst after this weekend.

I am so thankful for the Lord’s faithfulness. For the work he is doing in the lives of these students. 
I am so undeserving to have any part of it. And so privileged to be able to.

Praise the Lord.

reunion

This weekend is the Operation Barnabas reunion at Urban Hope in Philadelphia. We have 60ish of our 89 students and 5 of us leaders spending 3 days doing manual labor, finding opportunities to share our faith, and reconnecting to encouraged each other in our walk with Jesus.

The downsides:
1. We leave on a bus tonight at 5.30. Get to Worthington around 9ish. Get up far too early and drive to Philly. Jam packed weekend. Back on the bus by noon Sunday and back in Winona by midnight… I’m tired already.
2. Stacie and I have a board presentation (board meetings are also happening this weekend in Philly) about our new job as Ambassadors. I’m a teeny bit nervous.
3. 40+ people and all our stuff on one bus for 12ish hrs. 

The upsides:
1. Spending the weekend with these 4 other leaders, who are some of my very favorite people in the world. 
2. Some of our students are doing INCREDIBLY well at home. They are bursting with stories. I feel like my heart is going to explode when I hear this stuff.
3. Stacie & I get to share our passion, our vision, and our job description with these students. And they are at the heart of what we are so passionate about. I can’t wait to tell them the whole story.
4. Community showers… whoops, what?
5. At least 3-5 hilarious things are bound to happen with so many students & 5 very funny leaders in such a small space.
6. Sweet tea!
7. Even though it’s a longish drive, I do love driving the bus.
8. A day out of the office!

Should be a good weekend. Time to clean up the office, pack stuff up, inspect the bus, and take a tap…

books!

I love new books. I mean, I lava them (like hot lava). This is no joke.

Currently I am somewhere in the middle of these:

Death by Love
by Mark Driscoll and Gerry Breshears.
I love Driscoll (duh), and this book is a series of 12 letters written to people who have sinned or have been sinned against to explain how Jesus’ death accomplished exactly what they need for freedom.  The book is heart-breaking, educating, and exciting. The depth of what Jesus accomplished on the cross — man I pray I never get tired of thinking about it. It’s scandalous and beautiful. This is must read, if you ask me.

 

Worldliness
Edited by C.J. Mahaney
I like Mahaney. This book isn’t super deep, but it’s a good read, good definition of the issue of worldliness. I’d say a good resource with high school students.

 

On Church Leadership
by Mark Driscoll
Again, love Driscoll. I’ve been doing a lot of reading about church leadership lately, especially about women in ministry. This book is a great resource that I really recommend (he specifically addresses the role of Jesus, elders, women, deacons, church members, and leadership teams in churches). 
(Sidenote:: the issue of women in ministry is heavy on my heart right now. I have listened to some great sermons by Driscoll on the ‘key passages’ about women. Find them here:
I Timothy 2:11-15,3.2
I Corinthians 11
I Corinthians 14 

Don’t judge my love for Driscoll :)

 

 

Stand: A Call for the Endurance of the Saints
by John Piper
So I haven’t really gotten into this at all. But there are 2 reasons I know I’m going to love it. 1-John Piper! 2-Few people speak well on Calvinist doctrines such as the endurance (perseverance) of the saints. Piper does.

 

ESV Study Bible
I love the ESV because it is a LITERAL translation of Scripture (word-by-word, as opposed to thought-by-thought, like the NIV). The study notes, articles, and resources in this thing are outrageous. I seriously am in love with it. 

That’s it for now. There are more … but it’s time to head to Columbus to see the family and pick up some much needed furniture for the apartment.